2000-09 – Letters from Michaelangelo


Whoa… summer is already over! Great googly moogly! Time goes by WAY too fast in the summer, eh? Ah well… every new season offers its own chances to do different cool stuff. Gonna have to stow away the decks and wax the boards pretty soon!

So Rat King just attacked us! That was a BIG surprise! Me, Leon and Don-san left to do our usual mid-morning patrol one day and when we got back we found thousands of rats destroying our crib! NOT good! We had a big battle which was most uncool… fighting rats is wicked difficult, especially when you’re outnumbered 100 to 1 (or more)! Don saved the day by remotely activating a squad of Mousers that he had stored away in case of emergency (Donny boy is ALWAYS prepared, but he doesn’t always get the credit he deserves. Don’s the Man! =O)

With the Mousers help we managed to scare off the remaining rats. Leo did some detective work and came to the conclusion that Master Splinter had been there and that Venus and Raph were captured. Don’t ask me how he does it, I dunno!

Tracking where Raph, Venus and Splinter were wasn’t too difficult… every time we made a turn we got jumped by rats again. We figured we were headed in the right direction as long as the vile, villainous vermin were trying to stop us. This went on for a wicked long time until Don decided that we should just head straight for Splinter’s new domicile, which we did pronto. Endless armies of rats attacked us along the way, but we were determined to save our peeps so we waded forward and surfed the sea of rodent bodies! NOT a good day… but ya gotta do what ya gotta do, right?!

Once we got there we did not like what we eyeballed! Rat King was waiting for us, with Venus chained, blinfolded and gagged and Raph locked up in a cage barely big enough to hold him. Venus was out cold, but Raph was struggling, despite his awesome amount of wounds. Leo had actually been tracking our buds based on the blood trail left by poor Raph! Craziest of all was seeing Master Splinter standing next to Rat King like a zombie! Spooky! Rat King snarled something about vengeance and reaping what we sowed and then he sat in his cheesy throne. His eyes rolled back in his head and all of a sudden, Master Splinter and another horde of rats attacked us! Leo was more than ready for the attack and he conked the Sensei on the head and knocked him out cold in a millisecond. Leo looked WAY mad and he was NOT goofin’ around!

Don quickly programmed a defensive formation with the Mousers and made his way over to help Raph and Venus… that left yours truly to tango with the Rat King, who came out of his trance as soon as Master Splinter went down. It’s been awhile since I’ve been in a battle with a bad dude as big and strong as Rat King, but he isn’t the most trained fighter around. Hardest part was trying to maintain footing while hundreds of rats nipped and bit at my heels! Leo was making tons of rat fillets and carving quite a path behind Don-san. I did my best to take down the Rat King, but he’s wicked strong and must have a noggin’ of steel, cuz I got in 2 real solid clicks with my chukkas, but he managed to get away when I was overrun by a group of fifty rats the size of small dogs… I got buried in a pile of fur and fangs and was fighting for my life when Leo and Raph came to the rescue! Don had revived Venus by then and she was doing her brainiac mind-meld thingamajiggy to Splinter while the Mousers mopped up the remaining rats foolish enough to hang and fight (and there were ALOT of them foolsih enough to do so).

Eventually everything was cool and we headed back up to our pad to add up the damage… it was pretty awful! The rats totally trashed all of our stuff that they could get their teeth on, which was just about everything! They chewed through books, supplies, computers and everything else not made of titanium steel. It was such a major bummer… it looked like a tornado had gone through our humble home and decided to camp there for a few hours (and that’s pretty much what had happened)! Venus cried alot the first few hours of clean-up. We tried to chill her out, but she kept blaming herself for what happened. That’s crazy of course, but we haven’t had much luck convincing her otherwise. Master Splinter has been a little depressed since this happened too… he’s always been afraid of the Rat King and the potential for something like this to occur, so dealing with the reality of it has been hard on him. Donny is trying to whip up some kinda implant that the Master can wear to block Rat King’s powers, but the lab is still a mess and the inventive one has plenty to do just trying to get our security systems back on line.

So that’s about it… doesn’t sound as horrible as it actually was when typing it up. I don’t know what we’re gonna do about the rats and their monarch now, but we’re gearing up for more trouble. We’re still freaked about the attack and dunno why Kingster jumped us in the first place. Raph and Leo think the Foot have been up to something, and I wouldn’t doubt it. Mebbe they turned the King against us somehow. I wouldn’t be surprised!

Anyways, bud, I gotta go do some work and help the others. We’re taking breaks to write the letters, but we’ve still got so much to do it isn’t funny! The good news is April is coming over tongiht with some more stuff and she’s bringing pizza! Can I get a “COWABUNGA” for some pizza?! Yeah… I thought I could! =O)


Master Splinter

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